Sorry it took so long to get this done, campers. I know you all have empty, sad looking stockings waiting to be stuffed with consumer goods of glee, so here is my must have list of sockstuffin crap no family should be without.
For the brittle old ladies on your list, like me, who seem to suffer a broken bone just by turning their head:
For your fat lard cousin, who can’t seem to lose weight, no matter how much he complains about it:
For the laziest cook you know. Maybe it’s even you?
For all those friends who seem to end up in social situations where food and drink is served, with no table. Put one in your purse when crashing wedding receptions.
Okay, this is just retarded, but hey, I’m sure there’s someone on your Christmas list who could make use of this handy-dandy item, because who doesn’t want to put their weenie in a toaster?
Give this to anyone who does NOT live with you. God forbid you should open your dishwasher and find someone’s greasy sweaty hat in there.
Here’s one for your friends who don’t think they look quite cool enough with a Blue-tool device. This should definitely get the job done.
Let’s make food prep even more tedious for mom! They always say never buy a woman something that plugs in. But a food processor that you have to crank? By hand even? This shit is just cruel.
I don’t quite understand how this works, but I’m sure it’s real “sciency” and stuff. Guaranteed not to offend your recipient, no matter how they may interpret its intended use.
Um, yeah. You can make this one yourself! No need to buy! Great idea for that one lone sock. It will give it a sense of purpose. It’s been so aimless since the dryer ate it’s mate.
Great for the toddlers, old folks, and toothless friends and relatives on your list. Because I’m sure they eat so many hot dogs, they need this valuable tool to make serving and consuming them more fun!
What’s better for sore achy feet than walking around on shoddily constructed slippers full of hot steamy rice? Not a damn thing I can think of! Please send a pair of these bad boys to me! Size small.
Oh no, I’m not telling Aunt Betty we all would like to be less acquainted with her cleavage! You do it!
Hey! We have 1 of those ball cap washer forms. Works great—holds the cap, although for the greasiest & sweatiest of heads, sometimes they don’t come as clean as I’d like. But I can vouch that it does work.
Suzy
Sorry, just think they’re kinda gross. Do you put yours in the dishwasher?
I may have to get one of each because I hate, um I mean love so many of my relatives! yeah, that’s it, I love em!
There ya go. Spread that Holiday Cheer!!!!
Wow, now if I only had any cleavage, that’d be on my Santa list. The socks sound like something you just know your puppy’s gonna wanna tear apart and then you have rice everywhere.
Actually, the hot dog toaster set is kind of neat!
Probably sucks to clean though…
Oh I bet it would. Maybe next year they’ll have a Weenie Toaster Cleaning Kit for us to buy.
hehehe…. I’m loving the Sauna pants just wondering what else they could be good for?
OMG-I don’t think I want to know.
I wanna put my weenie in a toaster!
Don’t we all?
Best Stocking Stuffers EVVV ERR thanks you just made my xmas shopping sooo much more ..done
So glad I could help! Wish I was on your gift list.
You are on my gift of good wishes list. When I win a million dollars (or more) those that are on that list will automatically transfer to gifts wrapped with bows and stuff…
it could happen…
I love the weenie toaster!!! That didn’t sound right at all…
Tee hee. It can be yours for only $19.95!
Yay!
ha ha – good ones
Sauna pants… because that is where you want to get heat rash and sweat a lot.
But that hand cranked food processor, we have the marguerita maker version for camping, and it rocks.
Well that makes sense. Any gift that involves making booze better is okay with me! The As Seen On TV Blog is now following me on Twitter. Ha ha. Thought for sure I would have really pissed those folks off by now. Guess not.
I love those tv things. One out of every 100 is awesome. Get a flip and fold. They work.
I’ll take a Plate Buddy please!
Coming right up!
Unbelievable. And all the kind of stuff my mom would buy…
You poor kid.
Aww shit, you called me a kid!
Is that a good thing or a bad thing? Aren’t we about the same age?
It’s nice! I’m 55. Get senior discounts now. Usually answer to “hey old fucker!”
Oh, well you are just a teensy bit less newish than me. I won’t say older.
We’ll stick with kid.
Freaking dying laughing here in South East Texas!!! I’m sure most of my neighbors have half of this shit!! That’s it! I’m grabbing another beer! Bwahahaha!
I’m a fat lard, but I don’t complain about it. Also, I’d totally use that hat washer thing, but i’d use it in the washer instead of a dish washer. Mostly because I don’t have a dish washer.
Hilarious! I thought they had got the last one’s ‘Before’ and ‘After’ photos the wrong way round!