Vile gelatinous stuff
In every rainbow color
How you taunt me
You are so pretty!
Sweet, but nasty, fruity wonder
How I hate to have you in my mouth
The way you wiggle gives me the willies
Hate to see you on the table
“Do I have to take some, really?”
By yourself, you’re bad enough
Why can’t people just leave you alone?
They fill you with vegetables and other crap
BARF! I should have known…
Grandamas and aunts can’t resist
Your powers of suspension
Look at that! Cauliflower!?!?!?
You have filled the room with tension
And this one? How and why did they do that?
I just don’t get it. I’ll never understand
Just what the hell are you made of?
Extruded horse’s hooves should never be eaten by man.
Oh the horror of this dish
With it’s evil green olive eyes
If you make me eat this stuff
I’m sure that I will die
So, you have 1000 uses, good for you
salads, cookies, desserts, and God knows what
Even when they mix you with booze
I’ll keep my cake hole firmly shut
Related articles
I was in the hospital when I was 12. I could only eat jello for 3 days. I have not eaten it since. Disgusting stuff.
Two thumbs up to that! It IS disgusting! Thanks for your thoughts. It sure is pretty though, you can’t deny that.
Some of those pics looked… prechewed.
Buaaahaaahaa! Don’t make me spit coffee on my keyboard! I reallly hate jello. A lot!!
Oooh, I am not a jello fan either! Or ANYTHING gelatin:
Mastering the Art of French Cooking, vol. 1 by Julia Child
Foies de Volaille en Aspic, p. 548
Chicken Livers in Aspic
I have a Hallmark movie on right now. Am turning to something else just on principle. The characters are doing Jello shots!!
I have to admit I have done a few jello shots, but not my preferred method of alcohol delivery. Tee hee!
At the risk of having you delete my comment, I kind of like Jell-o. I used to go to the Forum Cafeteria (it no longer exists, though I’m pretty sure that had nothing to do with Jell-o) with my grandparents. They had red Jell-o cubes with whipped cream dolloped on top. I always took one for dessert.
Another favorite to make you squirm: Thanksgiving dinner my mom always took lemon Jell-o, added cottage cheese, and added crushed pineapple with the juice. We would serve it on a lettuce leaf with Miracle Whip thinned a little with cream, a maraschino cherry and a dash of paprika on top.
Pepto Bismal anyone?
Oh boy. That sounds ….awful?? Yeah, that’s the right word. My grandma always made orange jello with shredded carrots. Blecch!
It should be noted that Head Cheese is bits of pig head suspended in gelatin.
The people that ordered it from the deli when I worked there look exactly like the people you’d expect to order head cheese.
Thank you so much for that information that I really wish I could unread. That is just wrong on so many levels. In this day and age, people can eat just about anything they want, so you have to wonder why anyone would eat that!
I must confess… I sort of like jello (please don’t judge me). I don’t eat it any more because I’m vegan and so no gelatin, but occasionally I find a non-gelatin version, and it takes me back to visiting my grandma’s. So maybe it’s not the taste that I like, it’s the nostalgia that it induces…
I don’t judge anybody, here. If you like jello, that’s just fine!
But you know me, just gotta poke fun at stuff, and jello is perfect. It jiggles when you poke it.
Sorry, another Jello-O lover here . . . When I was a little girl my grandfather once teased us by blowing on his jello & encouraging us to do it too because it was so hot. To this day I often find myself blowing on jello . . . the things that amuse young minds, eh? Good memories. Also, being a sufferer from intestinal problems, sometimes it’s the only thing I can eat.
What an awesome story! Grandpas are wonderful, aren’t they?
What? Why? WHY!?!?! Why would anyone do any of those things to jello? Except the rainbow one, that was so pretty!
I am not a Jello lover, but I don’t mind it. Unless it is filled with vegetables, or seafood salad. (I just threw up in my mouth a little bit)
The most creative I’ve ever gotten with jello was hollowing out oranges cut in half. Fill the peel with orange jello. Let set and cut into wedges. The kids love them.
I know, right? People were so mean to food when I was a kid, and mean to us because they expected us to eat it!
It would appear there could have been a career in building jello scuptures back in the 60′s or whenever this gag-inducing delicacy was popular.
yep, and I think my mother tried them all. AAAACK!
So you don’t like jello? What kind of American are you?
The terrible kind. I don’t like baseball either. But, I do love apple pie. I’m from Nebraska, Art! Corn, and Husker football and beef, beef and more beef! It doesn’t get much more American than that, does it?
I suppose not.
Those pictures are like works of art.
beautiful, aren’t they? Almost look good enough to eat. Aack.
Almost.
Great job Cheeky!
It’s like a eulogy to Jell-O. May it rest in piece!
They promised me ice cream after they took my tonsils. Woke up to lime Jell-O. Really? Never again!
Red
Ha! Did you read my post about having my tonsils out? It’s an old one. I think if you type Hawaiian Punch in my search bar, you’ll find it.
On my way now to read!
I am not a jello person either! I love all of the jello pictures you found – hilarious! Why do people insist on combining jello with fruit? Yuck!
Or vegetables? Or meat salad! I just can’t stand it, but it sure is colorful.
It is colorful – almost scary colorful!
Forget waterboarding. Threaten me with Jell-O and red licorice and I’ll talk! Echhh!
Thank you new friend, how kind of you to reveal your weakness to me so abruptly. It usually takes months of wearing down a victim to get so much information.
I received my training from the French army.
I’m just reading your bio on your blog. I’m laffing! Love that flattering picture of you! Are you on the Twitter? I’m quite the twit. Just ask anybody!
I think that picture just about sums it up! No, I’m not a Twitterer. In fact, I’m socially (media) challenged at the moment but am starting Pinterest and some other SN pages to connect with my blog. I’m also a weekly contributor to http://www.gliterarygirl.com , which is a literary website. I know, weird fit, right?! Trying to build me “cred” beyond newspapers before publishing my first book in October, after which I will have some awesome door stops!
Ha ha! I too plan to publish a book in the coming months. It will be a compilation of the world’s worst haikus. Written by me and my readers. We do terrible haikus here on Thursday’s please join us. I work at a GMC dealership by day, but I also write elsewhere. I’m a weekly contributor at Forces of Geek magazine, and now write the blog for JustUnfollow.com, a company that develops apps for users to track their social media outlets. I’m doing a HUGE interview them for an upcoming post, and I’m not really up for it. But, not knowing how to do something has never stopped me before, Just take a look at this blog, it’s abundantly clear that I have no idea what I’m doing.
I will definitely check those out!
And the haiku posts
sound intriguing by the way
‘Cause I stink at it
And by the way, ignorance is bliss; the seeds from which my blog began. Of course, having an unlimited amount of “fertilizer” helped. Looking forward to following your stuff!
Thanks, and I look forward to reading you as well.
Hooray for silliness! And for some reason I have a sudden craving for pudding…
I’ve already done a poem about the worst offender in the pudding family…tapioca….. but, I find pudding as unappetizing as jello, sorry. But hey, I’ll eat just about anything as long as it’s got meat, cheese or chocolate in it. Oh and of course bacon. You just have to eat bacon these days to be a cool kid.
I’ve heard of this “bacon.” In fact, I think I have memories of eating bacon when I was younger. But, the wife likes sausage instead and it seems silly to have both in the fridge at the same time, so, alas, no more bacon for me. *hangs head dejectedly* (That last bit rhymed, did you see?) (I may have lost my mind from lack of bacon, poor, poor, me.)
Oh my friend, my refrigerator has neither at the moment. Enjoy the sausage.
OMG, you are also attacking Tapioca – my most favorite pudding in the whole world? Our tastes are so different! Although we agree on cheese & bacon – bacon!!!!
I did the tapioca poem months ago. I’m not currently attacking it…does that make a difference?
You still don’t like tapioca so the point is still made. But don’t worry, I still like you.
LOL, okay, thank you.
Haha. I don’t like jello either.
Hey there, I’ve been busy this morning, just read through the comments. People love your post! Including Mr. Cheeky Diva. He thought it was very, very nice of you. He’s read some of your things, I email him a post of yours every now and then, he’s not a blog reader really. He did love the one you wrote about being a trooper who let the droids get away.
I need to write another post into that segment. I’m glad you liked it!
My grandmother used to make Jello all the time. Thank you for inspiring fond memories, my friend.
You’re welcome. So nice to see you.
I just found this!!! I can really relate to it now!!!
So beautiful. I think they used all the colors from the color wheel! What do you think?
definitely. My family wasn’t too happy with this post. Silly Jello eaters. Oh well, whatever. Can’t please everybody all the time, right?
That is true, can’t please everyone. Have a great day! http://www.segmation.wordpress.com